by Joseph Matthews
Today, I want to talk about something that really seems to be an important topic to a lot of guys.
My book, The Art Of Approaching, is about how to meet women. In it, I do my best to unveil every little tip and trick I can teach you about how to avoid the painful, dreaded sting of fear that can build up inside you when you want to meet a beautiful woman.
The funny thing is, I get emails all the time from guys who say something like...
"I can’t do it, I’m too afraid of rejection."
"Every woman rejects me and laughs at me."
"There’s only so much rejection I can take."
A lot of dating sites and products will give you a lot of different advice on how to deal with rejection. They’ll say stuff like "you gotta force your way through it" and "ignore it, shrug it off."
But none of them really tell you HOW to do that.
They expect you to be some type of "emotional superman" and just act like you don’t care about what anyone thinks of you.
Though I do believe it’s good advice not to place too much importance on how others view you, for some guys this can just be too daunting a prospect to handle. Their heads just aren’t in the right place to act like that.
Let’s face it, if you see a girl you think is hot and you want to get to know her better, how can you NOT care about what she thinks of you?
And should she reject you, that can still HURT.
When this happens, guys tend to retreat into "self-loathing." They give into that pain and dwell on all the shortcomings and things that made that girl reject him. They wallow in the self pity and guilt, and despair about how "no girls like him."
Well, I want to tell you that this is not just self-destructive and unproductive behavior, it’s simply not true.
There are girls out there who will like you, you just need to FIND them!
Ever hear that old saying: "There’s plenty of fish in the sea?"
It’s true. Meeting women is about NUMBERS.
Too many guys want to sit up in a tree with their sniper rifles and try to hone in on just one target. If you do that, your chances of missing are much greater than if you were running around with a shotgun.
So your goal in meeting a woman who likes you is to meet as many women as possible!
But here’s the trick to ELIMINATING that painful sting of rejection that comes with that...
Ready for it?
Here it is...
Of all the women you meet, only go after the women who like what you have to offer!
There is something to be said about going up to every woman and trying to get them into you. In fact, there are very effective methods of creating attraction in women you meet, despite what your own personal shortcomings are.
But this can be a painful method for most men, because you can’t win them all! Therefore, you’re going to feel the sting of rejection if you do that.
For those of you who can’t handle doing that just yet, and need to build your confidence, here’s what I want you to do.
Go out and meet AS MANY WOMEN AS POSSIBLE.
Now, don’t try and pick-up all these women, even if you’d want to. Just meet them, and observe how they react to you when you’re interacting with them.
The women will tell you if they’re into you if you PAY ATTENTION TO THEM.
Some guys call this "vibing" or "feeling a vibe." But if what you’re doing is working, you’ll notice that the girl will smile at you a lot, touch you, and various other things.
When you notice these little flickers of interest, start flirting with her! Show her you also like what SHE has to offer (even if you don’t, this is practice, remember?). Then see how she reacts to THAT.
If she plays along and flirts back, she’s interested!
If she doesn’t, she may like you, but not be interested in you romantically.
If that’s the case, don’t get down, you weren’t rejected. You found out that there isn’t an opportunity there for you just yet. But if she responds, that’s a "GO" signal that will tell you the chance of getting rejected is shrinking, and you should proceed.
Wishing you success,